Quiet — safe — just Melvin’s voice reading aloud as he
writes.

MELVIN
‘Somewhat in the dark, she had
confessed and he had forgiven.
This is what you live for, he
said. Two heads on a pillow where
there is only the safety of being
with each other. How, she
wondered, could she find such hope
in the most shameful part of her.’

He barely reacts as we hear a LOUD KNOCKING at he reads.

SIMON (O.S.)
Mr. Udall.

But Melvin’s into it. His fingers flying as he reads.

MELVIN
‘At last she was able to define
love. Love was… ‘

More KNOCKING.

SIMON (O.S.)
Mr. Udall, I’d like to talk to you
please.

MELVIN
‘Love was… ‘

He almost has the rest of the sentence — the meaning of
love — but the knocking throws him.

MELVIN
… Son-of-a-bitch-pansy-assed-
stool-pusher.

He burst from his chair.

INT. APARTMENT BUILDING (NEW YORK) – HALLWAY – NIGHT

As Simon hears MELVIN through the door and takes a step
back. Melvin throws open the door. He looks demonic.

MELVIN
(loud and angry)
Yeeeess!!!

SIMON
Maybe this can wait.

Frank signals encouragement as Melvin opens the door.

SIMON
I found Verdell, Mr. Udall.

MELVIN
Well, that’s a load off.

Melvin walks back into the apartment and is about to
close the door when Simon has another burst of bravery.

SIMON
Did you… do something to him?

MELVIN
Do you realize that I work at
him?

SIMON
(eyes downcast)
No, I didn’t.

MELVIN
Do you like to be interrupt when
you are danging around in your
little garden?

SIMON
No… actually, I even shut the
phone off and put a little piece
of cardboard in the ringer so no
one can just buzz me from d…

MELVIN
Well, I work all the time. So
never, never again interrupt me.
Okay? I mean, never. Not 30
years from now… not if there’s
fire. Not even if you hear a thud
from inside my home and a week
later there’s a smell from in
there that can only come from a
decaying body and you have to hold
a hanky against your face because
the stench is so thick you think
you’re going to faint even then
don’t come knocking or, if it’s
election night and you’re excited
and want to celebrate because some
fudge-packer you dated has been
elected the first queer President
of the United States… and he’s
going to put you up in Camp David
and you just want to share the
moment with someone… don’t knock
… not on this door. Not for
anything. Got me. Sweetheart?

SIMON
Yes. It’s not a subtle point
you’re making.

MELVIN
Okay, then.

Melvin enters his apartment and slams the door shut.

SIMON
So the theory of confrontations is
that now he’ll think twice before
messing with me?

Frank smiles affectionately. Simon turns serious.

SIMON
He’s genuinely upsetting, isn’t
he?

FRANK
Won’t worry about it. You go
ahead.

Frank waits till Simon EXITS SCENE and then knocks loudly
on Melvin’s door. There is a sharp change in his demeanor.

MELVIN (O.S.)
Oh, I’m pissed!! Now I am really
pissed!!!

Frank waits patiently as Melvin jerks his door back open.
Frank immediately grabs Melvin by his shirt and jerks him
forward… Melvin is scared. Operating on survival mode.

MELVIN
No touch. No touch. No touch.

FRANK
You may think you can intimidate
the whole world with your
attitude, but I grew up in Hell.
My grandmother had more attitude.
You don’t intimidate me.

MELVIN
(calling)
Police! Police! Fucking crooked
police… doughnut-munching morons
help me!
(to Frank)
Assault and battery and you’re
black.

FRANK
Shhhh now. I like Simon. I like
him enough to batter you
unrecognizable if you verbally
abuse him or so much as touch his
dog again. Meanwhile, I’ll try
and think how you can make this up
to him.
(suddenly loud)
I hate doing this. I’m an art
dealer.
(beat)
Have a nice day. Party!

He tosses Melvin back and walks out. Melvin straightens
his shirt as he steps out into the hall. Frank smiles as
he re-enters the other apartment. Melvin appears impressed